A quiet but consequential shift in human behaviour is unfolding across continents, as the ability to tolerate emotional discomfort — and with it, the foundations of deep connection — shows signs of erosion. Viewed from Washington, a maxim by the investor Bill Ackman captures the stakes: experience is making mistakes and learning from them. Yet a growing body of psychological observation suggests that societies are increasingly organised to avoid precisely the kind of painful, solitary reflection that turns error into wisdom. The result, analysts in Latin America and West Africa warn, is a generation less equipped to sustain trust, endure loss, or forge the unhurried bonds that genuine friendship requires.

In Argentina, researchers have identified a telling symptom of this retreat from discomfort. The habit of falling asleep on the sofa, long dismissed as mere fatigue, is now understood as a search for emotional refuge — a way of numbing accumulated stress rather than confronting it. More striking still is the decline among those under 30 of what psychologists call a “silent skill”: the capacity to feel the pain of a loss and let it pass without immediately reaching for a phone, a parent, or a digital distraction. The impulse to seek external soothing, observers note, is not a superficial trend but a reflection of child-rearing patterns that have systematically reduced young people’s tolerance for solitude and emotional complexity.

Meanwhile, a different but related loneliness is surfacing among older adults. Argentine specialists report that the elderly often miss loved ones most acutely not when they are physically alone, but when they experience something meaningful — a small triumph, a moment of beauty — and have no one with whom to share it. A parallel insight from the same region reveals that many seniors feel unseen even when surrounded by family, because those around them have stopped asking questions whose answers they do not already assume. This is loneliness not of absence, but of being treated as a finished story. Commentators in the Middle East reinforce the point: real friendship, they argue, is built not on constant contact or demands, but on trust and the quiet confidence that someone will be present when it matters.

In West Africa, relationship analysts are drawing similarly stark conclusions about the cost of emotional shortcuts. Blame, they observe, is often a discharge mechanism for anxiety — a way of offloading discomfort rather than sitting with it — and it kills trust with surgical efficiency. The relationships that last, they add, are not necessarily those that begin with effortless chemistry, but those in which partners learn to navigate difficulty without resorting to accusation. Ackman’s aphorism, viewed from London, thus extends beyond individual growth to the health of entire relationships and communities: a mistake becomes valuable only when it is studied honestly and produces change. The forward-looking challenge is whether societies can rediscover the discipline of letting discomfort do its quiet work — and in doing so, rebuild the trust and curiosity that hold people together.